Having a wicked cold and feeling the need to stay put, I thought it might be the ideal time to reflect on another time I wasn't feeling too well. It should put today into perspective!
Before I had cancer, I had developed a love of Campari and soda, with a twist. If we went out for dinner, this is what I would order. I loved the bitterness and that bitterness used to somehow calm my stomach. That was before I met its evil twin sister.... Adriamycin.
After the surgeries, there was no real question that I would have to have Chemotherapy. The only question involved, which ones and how long. At the time the most conservative approach was a longer course of Cytoxin. If you followed this approach there would be a chance that you would not lose your hair, although Cytoxin decreased your white blood cell count and some other potentially nasty side effects. But it wasn't as aggressive as the doctors I consulted with felt I should be. The new kid on the block was Adriamycin. I was warned of its side effects. Hair loss would be a given. I could get easily sun burnt. There was a chance that I would damage my heart muscle. I was also offered the chance to be in a study testing a new drug. I felt, the AC option would make the most sense. I would know I was being given what had been shown to be the most effective full court press that had already been tested.
On the first day of chemo, of course I was very nervous. I had seen how terribly ill my mother had been when she underwent chemo. There was no choice for me to do anything but get to it. Glenn sat in the chair next to me. I had brought a cassette player and earphones and two tapes to listen to. One was the Tongan children we had met singing hymns. The other was a Kenny Loggins tape of lullabies, my friend MB had given to me.
I found when I listened I was transported, I felt as though there were angels singing.
The chair is a very comfy, lazyboy-ish chair. The nurse directed me to sit down and she brought a warm blanket to put on me. She said "You can get cold as the medicine goes in."
She hooked the first bag in.
After all this time I can't remember which it was first.
Before I had cancer, I had developed a love of Campari and soda, with a twist. If we went out for dinner, this is what I would order. I loved the bitterness and that bitterness used to somehow calm my stomach. That was before I met its evil twin sister.... Adriamycin.
After the surgeries, there was no real question that I would have to have Chemotherapy. The only question involved, which ones and how long. At the time the most conservative approach was a longer course of Cytoxin. If you followed this approach there would be a chance that you would not lose your hair, although Cytoxin decreased your white blood cell count and some other potentially nasty side effects. But it wasn't as aggressive as the doctors I consulted with felt I should be. The new kid on the block was Adriamycin. I was warned of its side effects. Hair loss would be a given. I could get easily sun burnt. There was a chance that I would damage my heart muscle. I was also offered the chance to be in a study testing a new drug. I felt, the AC option would make the most sense. I would know I was being given what had been shown to be the most effective full court press that had already been tested.
On the first day of chemo, of course I was very nervous. I had seen how terribly ill my mother had been when she underwent chemo. There was no choice for me to do anything but get to it. Glenn sat in the chair next to me. I had brought a cassette player and earphones and two tapes to listen to. One was the Tongan children we had met singing hymns. The other was a Kenny Loggins tape of lullabies, my friend MB had given to me.
I found when I listened I was transported, I felt as though there were angels singing.
The chair is a very comfy, lazyboy-ish chair. The nurse directed me to sit down and she brought a warm blanket to put on me. She said "You can get cold as the medicine goes in."
She hooked the first bag in.After all this time I can't remember which it was first.
The medicine began filling my veins and you could feel the coolness work itself from your arm out to the rest of your body. I focused on the music and tried to imagine the medicine was seeking out every cancer cell and wiping it out.
When the nurse brought a bag of strangely familiar red liquid in, I thought to myself, that looks just like Campari. "Hey you know, this won't be bad, I Like Campari!"
Then the drug made itself known. I could taste a bitterness in my mouth, it wasn't Campari, it was quite unpleasant. I found that after a treatment I would have that taste for several weeks.
That night we headed back home. Glenn thought he would get a movie to distract me. "Braveheart" On reflection I guess he wanted to say something there... But I only made it through 20 mins before the effects of the drugs took hold. Let's just say, all those things you have heard about people and chemo and their stomachs... it was all pretty true that night.
Long after I finished chemo, and returned to normal life. We walked into a restaurant for dinner, we waited for our table in the bar. The waiter walked over and asked if we would like anything to drink. I looked over at the bar and saw the bright red bottle of Campari. I immediately tasted the same unpleasant taste in my mouth and my stomach turned.
I had to literally turn my chair around so I wouldn't see it anymore.
So if you are planning to buy me something for my birthday...skip the Campari...heck skip the present and donate to my walk! I promise with each step I will be celebrating Adriamycin and how the evil twin sister helped save my life. With each step I will be celebrating how your donation will help find the one drug that will cure Cancer forever!
NEXT POST WILL RETURN TO WALKING...SOMEWHERE!
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